Brutal

lets call lost loves that were too blind to see the care we shot out of us that they never cared to reach, "the domino" and give them no credit for living.

we'll acknowledge the ones that never did so to us as "that demolished the cherished" and give them a shot to the lung so they realize they need it as much as somebody needs us.

then we'll thank viciously our little statistic makers who only ever brought drama and shoved cold hard facts in our face and label them "moments" and shove all their weaknesses in their face and brain wash them into nothingness as they once left us.

now we'll recognize the people that always doubted us and made us insecure "that only ever" and tell them they'll amount to nothing in life and scare the shit out of them.

we'll result to 'accidentally' bumping into an old face that will never mean anything to us just for the horrid past they engraved and bunch them as "mattered" and do unto them as they've done to us.

lastly we'll introduce THEM to Hell and classify them as "the domino that demolished cherished moments that only ever mattered" and sell it to the devil never giving them the chance they never gave us. and refer to ourselves as 'end" and start a new beginning with nothing but now in mind and remembering we are needed, we are somebody, we are important, we will amount to royalty in life, and give ourselves credit for living.

oh that sweet golden rule.

hello goodbye

good-bye misfortune and unanswered questions
hello adventure and discovery
good-bye dream catchers and letters ignored to loved ones back home
hello breaking and living in the moment
good-bye dependence and attachment
hello solitude and freedom
good-bye love and what ifs
hello living for myself and words of encouragement
good-bye my wondering soul and many unknown destinations
hello foot prints in the sand and naming a star in the night sky
good-bye the feeling of abandonment and fear
hello rosy cheeks and walking on sunshine
good-bye letdowns and misleads
hello dreams uncovered and so ready
....hello!

i am from tears,
from vicious scribbles and wadded up pieces of paper
i am from dead BIC pens (lifeless, thrown on the floor, out of ink...unwanted)
i am from a single dandelion,
whose seeds fly freely to a destination unknown, as if they were an uncertainty of thoughts waiting to be found.

i am from slamming doors and covers over my head,
from heart breaks and dead ends.
i'm from i'm always with you and just close your eyes
from i-miss-you-terribly to words-i-thought-i'd-never-speak.
i'm from he saveth my soul
with a broken heart to mend
and a needy reaching out hand.

i'm from his prayers and opening a beggers eyes,
cries and wonders.
from the destined trigger in hiding
the failure of attempts.

in pitch black begging for light
my other half waits for me
to share pitty, to share dreams.
t'was the sprouting of the wind blown seed,
new and so ready.

Destination ??????

A real kiss
Cancel bliss
True love
Already too much to ask

Tears of question
What are they for
Love never wanted me
Yet it's what I adore

A fairy tale at large
The perfect one at that
Happy ending in reach
Destination foreseen

Wanting that piece of heaven
Everyone else has
Willing to give whatever it takes
Desperate and on my knees
If only I could stay


[To JB, if only I could stay.]

Forever

Concrete waves wash away my concrete tears
From my concrete heart
In this concrete life;;
Where the footprints of the previous failure
Left them for me to follow and fall.
Now I will forever remember my faults;;
For the place I fell was wet cement,
Soon to be washed over by the concrete waves-
Which will leave them there permanently
Always to look back in shame!